Yes, Your Honour, I’m guilty of announcing on LinkedIn that I went to a conference and found it interesting.
In my defence, Your Honour, I would submit that I was restrained in my use of words such as transformational, honoured, great, privileged and incredible. And I emphatically deny describing anything as awesome.
Yes, there was a photo of the event, but I’m certain it wasn’t a selfie of me next to a minor social media celebrity*.
Your Honour, I realise now that my actions were reckless and degrading.
No, Your Honour, there was no material gain from my actions… Though, I did receive a handful of likes and two inane comments that I am obliged to repay sometime in the future.
Yes, Your Honour, I see that now. It was indeed a pointless waste of time and I concede that my actions contributed to cluttering up the internet with stupid and superficial content.
I have nothing further, Your Honour.
* A social media celebrity is defined as a person with over 1,000 followers. Can be easily recognised by their carefully invented title and often spotted handing out boomerang–likes (i.e expected to be returned in the near future).